When You Get Exactly What You Want
There are times in life when we happen to get the exact thing we're wanting. Maybe we have worked and strived for years to obtain it. Maybe by some happenstance that thing we've wanted lands in our lap. But it's a sobering reality when we find that the thing we've always wanted comes with a price.
It's kind of like time travel in movies. If you've seen Butterfly Effect or The Time Machine, you know what I'm talking about. You try to change that one thing; intercept that one moment, that one decision. But once it changes, all the other pieces rearrange too. You cannot change that one moment without affecting the course of your life.
Recently l had to make a hard decision. I achieved something I always wanted, but then found if I chose to keep it, I would lose a friend. Not only that, but it would probably drive me to lose some character in the process.
I thought I had won, but didn't realize all that would be lost.
The President of my Alma Mater was Dr. Mark Rutland when I was a student. He wrote a book that was called Character Matters. I couldn't tell you what was in it (even though I read it completely). I couldn't even tell you the name of a chapter. But the title of the book sticks in my mind. Yes, my character and integrity matters.
I've never cursed at someone. But ever since getting what I thought I always wanted I've come pretty close. And that's when I knew it was time to go.
It feels cowardly, to turn tail and run. At least that's what it looks like to everyone else. But I know what I'm really running from. In fact, it's something I'm running towards.