We all have a fuse, but its length can vastly differ from person to person. We are all capable of blowing up at someone; to raise our voice, use biting words, and even belittle the opposing party. But when an argument approaches that level of hostility, the chance of something productive happening drops dramatically.
You cannot control the attitude or emotions of your attacker, but you can choose your reaction. It's easy to fight back, to find a reason the other person is just as wrong or flawed, but that will only escalate what's happening. Anger is not a "fight fire with fire" situation. It can only be properly addressed with patience and grace.
I am a long way from having the proper reaction to a situation, but with each challenging encounter I can step back and grow my fuse just a little longer. Staying in grace and peace just long enough to last the volley, and address the root of an issue with a gentle answer.